Okay, the title is a bit of a lie. I have never been asked any of these questions. In fact, I'm not sure if anyone is reading this website. These are just questions that I assume any hypothetical people reading this website would like to ask me, if they were able to communicate with me.

Who the fuck is Wheatley?

Wheatley is a fictional robot ball from the classic video game Portal 2. He serves as the deuteragonist and later antagonist of the game. He's known for being very stupid and having a cool accent.

If that's not enough context, these wikis have articles on Wheatley that are way better than anything I could write:

Who the fuck are you?

I'm outer spec. I'm a queer, autistic Computer Science major who really, really likes Portal 2. Wheatley is one of my favorite characters of all time, so when I first decided to start using HTML and making Neocities websites, I made a fanpage all about him. This is that fanpage.

If you want to contact me, you can do that at I probably won't respond because I have a ton of unread emails as of writing this, and that's unlikely to change any time soon.

What's Neocities?

Neocities is the service that I used to make this website. With Neocities, anyone who knows HTML can easily make their own website for free! It's really fun, and if you miss the old web/never got to experience the old web but like its aesthetics, you should try doing it yourself.

Do you have any other Neocities websites?